Learning To Live Without The Soulish Self

Where do I even begin with this article? After having been a Christian since 1974, I begin to realise that most of the time, I have been operating from the "soulish" self. 

What is this "soulish" self that I am talking about? 

Paul the Apostle wrote in 1 Corinthians 2:14 - "But the natural (psuchikos, soulish) man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned."

This is the carnal self that gets easily provoked into anger or jealously. This is the self-centred self that loves to compare and compete. When meeting a new pastor of another church, subconsciously, the spirit of comparison and competition would take over - "Is his church bigger than mine?" "Is he smarter than I am?" "Is he a better preacher?" etc. The ego and pride, though, subdued, is regretfully there.

You may have encountered this "soulish" self in you. This is the self that is very calculative and always concerned about what is it that I can gain from the situation. 

If there is any wisdom granted by the Lord, this soulish self would have converted it into scheming, manipulating and plotting how to get ahead for himself.

Even though, the teaching of the Bible, from time to time, drags this reluctant soulish self to face the spiritual truth so as to produce something godly, it rushes back to its throne once the job is done. Yes, this soulish self has a throne and it will not surrender this precious seat to anyone - not even to God. 

This soulish self is egoistic and self-centred. It loves to be served, accepted, respected, supported, cherished, honoured and appreciated.  It enjoyed being dressed up and pampered. It is unstable and insecure and so it perpetually guards against all attacks - real or imagined. Thus it is very sensitive and defensive so much so that it can easily be hurt and offended.

The Bible has an answer for this soulish self and it is found in Galatians 2:20 - "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

Cross-referencing to Luke 9:23 - "Then Jesus said to all of them, 'If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me.' 

This is the soulish self that needs to be crucified on the cross in order for me to truly follow Christ. Denying myself does not mean that I lose my personality. It simply means that now I know that I belong to a Master. From now on, I will consciously recognise Jesus as my Master and actively obey His every request. It is a paradigm shift to a different consciousness. 

When this transformation seriously happens, then I would be learning how not to operate from the carnal soulish self but rather function from the "spiritual" self under Christ. This spiritual self is my true self - the one that God wants me to be. It is free because it has nothing to judge and nothing to defend. In Christ alone, it placed its trust. 

This is my new journey - Learning to seriously take up my cross daily and follow Jesus. Kindly pray for me as I take this pilgrimage to the heart of Christ. Thank you.

Albert Kang