Revealing Your True Self To Be Loved And To Share Love?

Growing in Love

"We love him because he first loved us."1

"How many feel they would like to have more love in their life?" is a question I have asked many times to seminar attendees. Many, if not most, hands are raised. When I ask the same folk how many feel all of their love needs are being met, very few hands are raised.

Some years ago there was a popular song by Jackie Deshannon that stated, "What the world needs now is love / Sweet love / It's the only thing / That there's just too little of / What the world needs now / Is love, sweet love / No, not just for some / But for everyone."

Those words still ring true because so many of our human problems are caused by a breakdown or failure in love. And when I ask people how we get more love in our life, inevitably almost all say by giving love. Sounds good, but that isn't always true because we can't give what we don't have. In fact, unless I have learned to love and accept myself in a healthy way, I am not able to love or accept anyone else in a healthy way. My love will be contaminated by need.

Thus, love is an action/feeling to be learned. We didn't come into the world knowing how to love—only with the ability to learn how to love. So how do we learn to love? John stated that we love God because he first loved us. The same principle holds true for human love. We love others because others (or another) first loved us. If they didn't, and we didn't receive sufficient unconditional love as a child and learned how to love then, we need to receive it now and learn how to love maturely now.

Furthermore, I can only be fully loved to the degree that I am known. Thus, the way we grow in and learn to love is by becoming vulnerable and allowing at least one or two safe, accepting, and non-judgmental persons see and know us as we really are—warts and all. And as they love and accept us as we are, little by little we learn to love and accept ourselves. And as we learn to love and accept ourselves, we are then freed both to give and receive love without strings attached. But as long as we hide our inner or secret self (our dark side) behind any kind of a mask (no matter how sophisticated that mask may be), we will never feel fully loved, nor will we be able to fully love. I repeat … we can only ever feel fully loved to the degree that we are fully known.

Risky? Yes. But not to learn to love is the greatest risk of all.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, please help me to find a loving, safe, nonjudgmental, accepting person that I can trust, so I can share my total self with this person and be truly accepted and loved by this person for who I am (and not for what I do or don't do), so that I, in turn, can learn to accept and love others more fully. And help me to experience your love more and more so that I will also be able to love others more and more. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. 1 John 4:19.

Article by Rev Richard Innes

False Versus True Humility

False Versus True Humility

 

"Clothe yourself with humility toward one another, because, 'God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.'"¹

Somewhat related to arm-twisting for God are those situations where somebody has a song, a poem, or an article they have written that they want to have published. They state clearly that it wasn't their creation but, rather, God gave it to them and they want him to have all the glory. I think that God sometimes, but not always, doesn't want the glory for some of these creations!

Writing in Christianity Today some time ago, Eutychus also felt that there are times when God gets more credit than he wants.

For example, "A boxer once credited the Lord for helping him punch his opponent into the Twilight Zone. Then there was the football player who made a diving, juggling catch in the end zone. His explanation of the stellar effort mentioned nothing about his speed, agility, coordination, and training: It was God who made that catch."

Humility has nothing to do with not appreciating what you have worked hard to achieve. Certainly, we want to thank God for the talents he has given us, but, among other things, genuine humility is being realistic about what you have achieved and being able to equally rejoice in another's achievements.

Furthermore, to claim God gave me a poem or an article as a means to get my creation accepted for publication isn't humility either. It's lying. I've written a few things in my life that have been published (and a few that have been rejected), and for whatever talent I may have been given, I give God the glory for that.

At the same time writing to be published for me is hard work and what I write about has mostly come from a lifetime of experiences, many of them very painful. This is probably true for most writers who have something of value to say. Yes, there are times of inspiration but mostly it's only about five percent inspiration and ninety-five percent perspiration. God may give us the five percent but the rest is up to us. He gives us the basic talent but it is our responsibility to be trained so that what we do say and write will hopefully bring glory to God. And that may be best left for others to judge.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, I thank you for the gifts and talents you have given to me. Help me to be responsible with these gifts, develop them to the best of my ability, and use them truly for your glory. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. 1 Peter 5:5 (NIV).



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By Dick Innes

Watch Out for Phonies

"Come, let us meet together in one of the villages on the plain of Ono. But they were scheming to harm me."¹

When Nehemiah and the ancient Israelites had almost completed rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem several centuries BC, enemies were not happy with their progress and sought to discourage Nehemiah and get rid of him. They tried to lure him away from his work by inviting him to meet with them in the Plain of Ono.

But Nehemiah's reply was, "O no!" He knew their stories were fabricated and that they were lying. Just as well he did, otherwise he would have been destroyed and God's work frustrated. Nehemiah stuck to the job until the work was finished and the walls rebuilt.

Whenever we get involved in a fruitful work for God, opposition is usually par for the course. The enemy attacks at every opportunity and usually at our most vulnerable points. He is a master of deceit and will seek to discourage us, sidetrack us from the main task to waste our time on less important matters, tempt us to stray from the beaten path, and so on. Whatever devices he uses we, like Nehemiah, need to be aware of these, for more often than not he comes as an angel of light.

When in doubt, we need to pray for God to reveal to us the truth of the situation in which we find ourselves. Realize, too, that the more authentic and real we are, the easier we will "smell" (discern) those who are not for real and are seeking to distract us so that they can lure us away from what God wants us to do.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, please give me the same kind of insight, wisdom and courage that Nehemiah had and stick to the work you have for me to do until it is finished. Help me to say 'no' to any temptation or distraction that would take me away from following and serving you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Nehemiah 6:2 (NIV).

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By Dick Innes

And Jesus Stood Still

"And Jesus stood still."1

Down the long, dusty road on their way from Jericho to Jerusalem, almost two thousand years ago, trod Jesus with his motley band of twelve disciples, followed by a huge crowd.

They were all hot and sweaty. The dust clung to them. They were weary, but Jesus was at the height of his popularity, and the great crowd of people pressed close to him. They were jabbering endlessly. Asking questions. Seeking favors. They could be heard a mile away.

"Hey, what's all the noise?" blind Bartimaeus asked his friend as they sat by the roadside begging.

"I don't know," answered his friend with a puzzled tone in his voice.

"Let's ask someone," they agreed.

"It's Jesus," a passerby informed them.

"You mean Jesus of Nazareth, the fellow they claim can heal the sick and the blind?" Bartimaeus excitedly asked.

"That's the one," the man said, "and I'm on my way to see him. Good-bye."

The crowd came closer and closer. Excitement filled the air. The noise became intense.

"I can't believe it," shouted Bartimaeus to another friend. "This just has to be my lucky day. I've got to get to Jesus; I know he can heal me."

"Hey, Bart, there he is," cried Bartimaeus's friend, "but how will you ever get his attention?"

Dignity was dismissed. "This is it," said Bartimaeus, "I may never see Jesus again and I desperately want to be healed."

So, seeking to drown out the noise of the crowd, Bartimaeus yelled at the top of his voice, "Jesus, have mercy on me! O Lord, son of David, have mercy on me!"

"Cool it, man! Shut up!" retorted some of the crowd. "You're making too much noise. You don't stand a chance of getting to Jesus, so just relax and quit your stupid yelling!"

But Bartimaeus was all the more determined to get to Jesus. He couldn't see, but he could yell. He cried out all the louder. Hear his voice rise above the din of the crowd. It rings out like a great clarion call, "Jesus, O Lord, Son of David, have mercy on me! Jesus, O Lord, Son of David, have mercy on me!"

And Jesus stood still.

And the crowds stood still.

And a great calm settled down over them all.

The winds and the waves couldn't stop Jesus. Neither could angry mobs. Crowds of people couldn't stop him either. But a lone, blind beggar could—and did.

And Jesus with his great heart of compassion asked for Bartimaeus to be brought to him.

"What do you want me to do for you?" Jesus asked.

"Lord," Bartimaeus replied, "please give me my sight." And Jesus did!

"Go your way," he said, "your faith has made you whole."2

Friend, what do you want Jesus to do for you? Are you as determined as Bartimaeus was? Am I?

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, have mercy on me a sinner. Hear the cry of my heart. Please save me from sinfulness. Heal my wounded spirit and fill my empty heart with your love, joy and peace. Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me too. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Mark 10:49 (KJV).
2. Adapted from I Hate Witnessing by Dick Innes (Updated Edition), 155-157. On sale at: http://tinyurl.com/33kfbk.

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By Dick Innes